I am a wee bit obsessed with drop-crotch pants. The spacious trouser shape should be so wrong, and yet looking like you’ve pooped your pants has never looked so right. For ages, the crotch-camp has been owned by the Ninja Warriors of the East. You know the ones, Japanese by origin and swathed in layer upon layer of Comme des Garcons fabrics and armed with yet to be released Samsung gadgets. I have tried my hand at the look, but I just look like a gap year wash up – or worse, Justin Bieber.
I have spent the last few days in a Pinterest black hole, under the umbrella of “blogger research” I have been browsing e-stores in pursuit of the perfect pair, jotting down notes and styling tips as I go along. On my sartorial sabbatical I discovered some common themes amongst the Celine wearing street stylers, and those in The Row, so like the Baz Luhrmann of the cropped trouser world “I will dispense my advice now”…
THE GOLDEN RULES OF DROPPING IT LIKES ITS HOT
1. Skin: Show some. I highly encourage you to flash some serious ankle and shin flesh. None of this hi top sneaker blurring into your trouser leg malarkey. To master the art of dropping le crotch, you need to get a wee bit of skin out.
2. (not so) Strictly monochrome: Purple leopard print is a no-no, as is rainbow coloured vertical stripes and anything that resembles gaudy pajama pastels -sleek and chic is achieved with a muted colour palette. If you want to look karate kid cool you need to keep it to black, white and grey (oooh and beige, beige is ok too).
3. The Law of Distribution: Wear a crisp white shirt, or a tee and tailored blazer, with your cropped low risers to balance proportion. It’s important that your hemlines cascade in straight lines, so get your steamer out to keep it vertical. You might look like you’re smuggling goods between your who-ha and your knee caps, but if you’re shirting is worn skinny, the look is dapper not diaper.
4. Le feet, c’est chic: Brogues, boots, slip ons (slip offs), plimsolls and pool slides are all perfectly acceptable accessories, but the pants are the focus so don’t distract with attention craving hi tops, or fluffy boots.
5. Fabrications: Wool for winter and loose and languid linen for summer. Fabrics associated with tailoring = good. Sparkly, spangly and stretchy = bad.
